Hmmmm…..THAT could be a Red Flag

Alright Ladies!

You’ve met him! You’ve been dating about 3 months now. He’s perfect! He meets all criteria on your checklist, smart, funny, stable, handsome and you are in absolute awe of him. But WAIT! Did he just ask you to pay his phone bill??? Pump the brakes! PUMP DA BRAKES! It takes time for the dating “representative” to step aside and the real person to emerge. Here are a few red flags that you may want to look over before you consider going any further.

  1. Baggage: We all have it. But if you say you’re going to be a little late and his rebuttal is “Oh, you must be trying to see your ex-boyfriend before you come see me or something.” I think it’s safe to say he’s carrying a few things that will surly leak into your relationship. Clear sign of trust issues. Or, my personal testimony: If he looks through your phone on your first date while you’re in the bathroom….Yes. He’s crazy.
  2. Anger Issues: If you get to his house and see holes in the wall…..RUN! This guy either plays way too rough around the house or someone has punched a wall or two. Either way, aggression is a sign of potential deeper anger management issues.
  3. Financial Issues: We have all come across tough financial times before. Most men are bread winners by nature. If he is having issues paying simple things such as a phone bill or keep gas in his car, that is a sure sign of money management or larger issues. Consider his financial situation and whether you will assist or hinder the restoration of financial difficulty.
  4.  Ex Issues – Does he report ALL his exes are crazy? That it was always his ex girl who caused the issues, never him? Ummm….You attract what you ARE. Not what you WANT. Just saying…….
  5. Mom Issues: Most teenagers cannot stand their parents. I know I gave my mother a run for her money. But once matured, those mountains become the size of peas. If there are unresolved parental issues it may be a sign to a bigger issue – unable to communicate his emotions, stubbornness, grudges etc. Although these characteristics are normal/human, it can cause additional stress on the relationship if not resolved sooner than later.
  6.  Multiple marriages/divorces: This could mean several things. A: He’s a really good guy that values family and two parent households B: He falls in love extremely easily or C: He’s crazy LOL Just kidding. Seriously, there IS a reason his marriages aren’t lasting. If he attaches very easily, it could be because of profound emotional, abandonment, or dependency issues. Most men are very particular about who they give their heart to. They will give their bodies away in a minute but their heart is guarded by Mt. Everest! Pay attention to this.

At the end of the day, deal with people where they are in life. Accept them for who they are. Everyone has been through something and most people are good intended spirits. It’s up to you to decide whether or not you want to deal with a certain type of issue. It’s about balance. Maybe you can deal with the clinginess, shoot… helps with your insecurity issues, but the financial issues are an HE Double Hockey Stick NO! And that’s cool! Take your time……being single isn’t as bad as society makes it seem. Your King is on his way Be good to each other.

1 Comment

  1. January 13, 2015 at 4:08 pm

    Keep helping people and you’ll get everything you wish in life.

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Chanel Crawford

Chanel Crawford